Okay, see I’m very technologically challenged here. Our scripture today is Mark 10 verses 1 through 16. It’s written for you there, so follow as I read along here. This is God’s holy word. And he left there and went to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan. And crowds gathered to him again. And again, as was his custom, he taught them. And Pharisees came up, and in order to test him, asked, Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife? And he answered them, What did Moses command you? And they said, Moses allowed a man to write her certificate of divorce and to send her away. And Jesus said to them, because of your hardness of heart, he wrote you this commandment.
But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So there are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. He said to them, whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, and if she divorces her husband and marries another she commits adultery. And they were bringing children to him that he might touch them, and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it, He was indignant and said to them, Let the children come to Me. Do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.
And He took them in His arms and blessed them, laying His hands on them.” Thus far, God’s holy, inspired, and infallible Word. It will please the Lord to take his word and transform it in our lives into service for himself. Thanks be to God. Heavenly Father, we ask now that you’ll help us to understand the passage like this. It cuts right down into the very depths of our lives. We’re always dealing with the matter of marriages and breakups and children and questions that arise about them. And Lord, there’s a lot of things that we struggle with, but please help us to gain from a study this morning what will encourage us and bless us. And we do ask this all now in Jesus’ name. Amen.
The entirety of this passage speaks to marriage and the family. What do I mean by that? It talks about husbands and wives and children. That pretty much covers the family, does it not? Although divorce is the question raised by the Pharisees, The assumption is the sanctity of marriage and the blessing and importance of children. So that’s what we’ll be dwelling on pretty much today. Now I may be speaking today to some who have suffered through divorce, as well as to some who have never been blessed with children.
And it’s not my intention to make anyone feel guilty or unfulfilled. On the contrary, My hope is to hear the Lord’s invitation to enter into the future that is represented by the loving family into which God has placed us in Christ. Remember, in heaven, there’s no marriage, there’s no procreation, just loving relationships that never sour.
So I want to encourage you today to listen to this, whatever your background may have been, because we’re looking ahead. We’re looking to what lies before us here, and we live in a place here where there’s, we might say, a large family. And in smaller groups here, we love one another, we interact with one another. God has given us this sort of relationship, even if we’re not married. And I’ve seen husbands and wives come in here together also, so that’s not unusual. But I think overall, we ought to think of ourselves as a family here.
And I want us to think of children that we don’t have with us now, although we may have visits from children. But I want us to think of the families that we have. separated from for various reasons and continue to think of that relationship and the love that goes on there as well. So again, my purpose is not to make anybody feel guilty today, but just to look forward to what the Lord would have us to understand and then to put into practice in our lives here at Brookdale. So we have four points this morning to consider.
The first is marriage and children were a part of his teaching. In other words, nobody went up to Jesus and said, why don’t you ever teach about marriage? Or why don’t you have anything to say about children? No, He was always dealing in those matters and we have examples of it.
And then, the Kingdom of God is built upon the converted children of believers. Now that doesn’t mean that others have no role to play or anything like that, but the Kingdom of God is built upon the conversion of our children to follow the Lord. Thirdly, Jesus came from, and therefore was the product of, a godly home.
And finally, something that is in the book of Malachi, the last book of the Old Testament, wherein the Bible says God hates divorce. Now he doesn’t say God hates divorcees. He doesn’t say that God hates everybody that has a marriage breakup. It just says God hates divorce, that entity of divorce. counter life, as you will, that we’ve just kind of mentioned here.
Well, we’ll get to that, Lord willing, as we go along here. Marriage and children were part of his teaching. Now, first, let me read from Mark chapter 10. That’s where we are in Mark 10 there, verse seven. It says, a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife.
And that’s his teaching. This is not just Old Testament stuff here. This is the teaching of Jesus. And then it says in Matthew 18 verse two, and Jesus called a little child to him and set him in the midst of them. In other words, when you put somebody in the midst, then you’re saying, look here, this is important. So Jesus has something to say about husbands and wives and children.
It’s part of his teaching, a regular part of his teaching. Now, it says it was his custom. Well, it was his custom to teach, yes, but all the things that were in his teaching were part of that custom as well, which gives us another reason to think that Jesus had a good bit to say about marriage and the family and children.
True marriage involves God’s joining together a man and a woman as life partners. If you have to have a definition, I want to know what marriage means. It means joining together of a man and a woman as life partners and with the expectation that they will reproduce. and that those that are reproduced will love the Lord and serve him too. You say, no, that’s not always true. Yes, but that’s what God wants. That’s what God intends.
Marriage and children are fitted into three things. In other words, they fit right in. And I think we might say accurately, they fit right into what Jesus was teaching and saying. First of all, they fit into the creation design. When God created the heavens and the earth and all the things in the world, He created man and woman and He said, be fruitful, reproduce. And that becomes then the paradigm that we follow. Marriage and children are fitted first of all into creation design.
Second, They’re fitted into the law of God. When you read through the commandments of God in Exodus, Leviticus, Deuteronomy, and so forth, you’ll find that God has a lot to say about relations between husband and wife and children. It fits right into that. In fact, the law itself, the commandments of God, were made with covenant life, marriage life, child-parent life in view. And then thirdly, it fits into the Christian life. We’re going to serve the Lord as faithful spouses, as faithful children who don’t rebel against their parents. That’s the ideal, and that’s what God’s able to bring about in great measure.
Marriage is not supposed to be broken. Now, we’ve already mentioned divorce. We know marriages do get broken. But it’s not supposed to be. This is not what God desires. Not supposed to be broken. Nevertheless, as we say, divorce happens. And why does divorce happen? Because of sin. Why does any bad thing happen? Any unfortunate, heart-wrenching thing happen? It’s because of sin. Sin is in us. Sin is in the world around us. Sin is in husbands. Sin is in wives. Sin is in children. Marriages break up because of sin. So if we’re going to try to follow what the Lord says, then we’re going to have to deal with sin. Lord, forgive me. Lord, help me not to do this and that and the other thing that will harm my marriage, my relationship with one another.
Now, if we’re talking about this community that we live in here. It’s a kind of marriage. It’s not marriage as such, but it’s a kind of marriage. And we want to say, Lord, let not my sin break up the relationships in here. Rather, let the power of the Holy Spirit draw us closer together. And that’s really where we are, isn’t it? Whatever may have happened in our past, right now, we live in a company of people who have relationships. And we want those relationships to be solid and unbroken. and we’re asking God, or if they have been broken, to heal those relationships.
Jesus talked about the fact that Christ and the church will have a relationship that is mirrored by marriage. It’s that close, it’s that intimate. And eventually, that relationship between Christ and His people is going to replace all other marriage. The Lord didn’t say, I’m going to abolish marriage. It just didn’t work.
He’s going to say, I want you to see what a true lasting relationship, what true love is. The church will mirror that, but one day it will be absolutely perfect for those who know me, for those that will be in heaven with me. Jesus, though he was unmarried, and there are reasons that he was unmarried, but though unmarried, he heartily approved of marriage and children, as you can see from the example here in the passage and throughout the Bible, throughout the New Testament especially. He heartily approved of marriage and children and championed it.
He didn’t say, don’t get married. Now, somebody says, but the Apostle Paul said, it’s better for you not to be married. Well, that was in a very specialized circumstance. That wasn’t the ordinary or the thing that God expected. So just keep that in mind.
Jesus, though unmarried himself, heartily approved of marriage and children. and championed both things. Well, that’s our first point. Marriage and children were part of his teaching. You couldn’t sit under Jesus’ teaching and not be taught about marriage and children and the importance of these things.
Secondly, the kingdom of God is built upon converted children of believers. Now, there are two ways that people enter the kingdom of God. Either they are rank unbelievers, maybe never had any connection with Christianity or Christian homes or anything, but they come to the Lord and they join His people in that way. And the other way is that you’re the child of a believer. And as a child of a believer, you can say, no thanks. I have another way to go and have fun and do things. I’m not going to get involved in that, and many children do that, of course.
But the Kingdom of God is built upon children taking up the faith of their parents. They can sing heartily, Faith of Our Fathers, and there’s another hymn that goes Faith of Our Mothers, taking that up. and saying, that’s going to be my life too. I know Father was a pharmacist, but I’m going to be a horse breeder or something like that. You don’t have to do the same thing, but you have to be committed to the Lord. So it’s built, and that’s one of the reasons that Jesus brought that child and set him in the midst of them and so forth, that people might see that here’s how the people of God grow. They have children who become believers themselves. You’re not automatically a believer, but you’re certainly given a great advantage in saying, I want to be like my mother or father. I want to follow the Lord also.
So Jesus expected parents to teach their children. And one of the reasons he says, don’t be rebellious against your parents. Children, obey your parents because they’re your teachers. Children, obey your parents. Learn from your parents. And just read the book of Proverbs, how you’re supposed to learn from godly parents and not be rebellious against them.
He expected parents to teach their children and to guide them into the kingdom of God. A lot of parents say, go find a guide somewhere. I’ll pay for your college or I’ll help you in this way or that way, but the main thing is to teach your children about the Lord and to guide them in that direction. Raise up a child in the way he should go when he’s old and not depart from it. Well then, The law, the commandments, instructs us how and what to teach children.
We don’t have time to go into every command in the Old Testament about children should do this and parents should do this. It’s all there. wonderfully illustrated there. I’ll just read you from the Psalms, actually. This is Psalm 78, and I think I’ll read the whole psalm, not the whole psalm, but the whole passage that’s relevant.
It says, he established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers to teach to their children. that the next generation might know Him, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but keep His commandments.” So the law has a lot to say about husbands and wives and parents and children, especially teacher children.
The kingdom of God is illustrated by children coming to Jesus. Children, as I said, are not automatically going to heaven. They have to believe. But parents and children have played a great role in all this. And he called a child, it says. He called a child. Come here, Johnny. Come here, Mary. Called a child, set him in their midst. This is an illustration of how people ought to come to Jesus. And that’s one reason I said the Kingdom of God is built upon this idea of coming to Jesus. When He summons you, you come. Now, there’s such a thing as hardness of heart.
When they ask him about Moses, did Moses allow divorce? And Jesus quoted the fact that Moses said, you could write a bill of divorcement, as he called it, and divorce could happen that way. Didn’t say he approved of it. It was mainly to save the lives of some of the people involved, especially the women in those days.
So the hardness of heart, was the reason that Moses gave that commandment that people’s hearts were hard and they weren’t forgiving, in other words, and they were cold. And let me say that hardness of heart and coldness retards the raising up of godly children. It just doesn’t work if the parents have hard hearts and coldness. There needs to be love, that’s why we sang this morning. Happy is the home where love is filled in everything, going in every direction. Hardness of heart and coldness retards the growth, the coming to the Lord of godly children.
The entrance of children into the kingdom is to be studied and followed upon. One of the reasons that God Christ in particular, put that emphasis upon children. So you would study that and think about that and seek to learn from your children. A little child shall lead them, the Bible says. May not have been talking specifically about parent-child relationships, but a little child coming to the Lord, avoiding the hardness of heart and the coldness, that’s a great way for things to end up well. The entrance of children into the kingdom of God is to be studied and followed upon.
Now, we can do that for each other. Some are older here, some are younger here. You might think the older ones look upon the younger ones with the idea that they need to come to the Lord too. Or our children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren may come to visit us here. And you have a role to play in that too. Show them warmth and love and not coldness and indifference.
Not complaining, you didn’t come to see me or whatever happens. Jesus came from and therefore was the product of a godly home. I think we miss that a lot in our studies. Jesus was raised in a home and he didn’t begin his ministry until he was 30 years old. He had an adoptive father because he was virgin born, as the Scripture tells us. But he had an adoptive father who was a just man.
Matthew 1.19, then Joseph, her husband, being a just man. In other words, he was honest. He was godly. He was a good father, a good husband. That was part of the godly home that Jesus came from.
Jesus is called the carpenter. And in another place it says He was the son of a carpenter. which has to mean that he learned from his father. His father taught him, was patient with him. His father, maybe as they were planing wood or doing other things that carpenters do, may have said something about the scriptures and what God expects and so forth. It was a home where a father, we don’t know when Joseph passed away, but a father, at least for a while, taught his son the things of God.
And then he had a virgin mother who was wonderfully yielded to the Lord. In other words, she wanted to do what God wanted. Now, I don’t think her husband asked her to do things that were wrong. I just think that she wanted to do the will of God, and when she was told that she would have this very unusual child, a virgin-born child, well, she says that whatever your will is, Lord.” I’ll just quote here. It says, “‘Be it unto me according to thy word.'” If you read the Christmas story, that’s what Mary says to the angel. “‘Be it unto me according to thy word.'” So he had an honest, just, competent father, and he had a godly, yielded mother.
And you can say, well, Jesus would have been Jesus no matter what, but I don’t think that’s necessarily the case. Jesus was what Jesus was because of His Father and His Mother, who are godly examples and teachers to Him. Why is a godly home important? It was important for Jesus. It was important for you and me, and for those that we influence as well. Now his parents, especially Mary, were awed by his commitment to God.
You see that a little later when Jesus gets left behind accidentally to interact with the teachers in the temple and so forth. But when Jesus explained to them, I must be about my father’s business, They scratched their heads. They said, we don’t understand this at all. But again, they were yielded to the will of God.
But you see, in addition to a godly father and a godly mother, there were godly influences on his life. And this one instance of his being at the temple in Jerusalem is just indicative of the fact that he grasped everything that he could and of course God was controlling everything, but he grasped the teachings that he did receive that was part of his godly upbringing. The law instructs us how to teach our children. And so that did happen to Jesus. His parents were awed by the depth of his commitment to what he was being taught from any direction, but especially things that had to do with messianic work that was going to be his.
His ability to resist temptation. Remember those times just at the beginning of his ministry when he was led into the wilderness by the Holy Spirit and Satan came against him and so forth? And I’ll just quote this one thing. He says, it is written, you shall not tempt the Lord your God. Of course, he was tempted a couple of other ways there as well. But the point is that he learned to resist temptation.
Do you think that was the only time that Satan came to him? It says there in that instance that Satan said, I’ll wait a while and come back again. We don’t have those recorded for us. But here’s this godly home, godly father, godly mother, godly influences all around him. And yet Satan says, just let me at him. but he said, it is written.
He knew the Bible. How did he know the Bible? He didn’t have a Bible on the shelf necessarily. He had the scrolls in the tabernacle or the synagogue, but somehow he knew the word. He knew what was written. It wasn’t just sort of ingrained in him without any teaching. He knew what was written and he was able to resist temptation and that was part of his godly upbringing as well.
Now, Joseph probably died rather early, but Jesus was the eldest son, so he would have had time with his father in that regard. And as the eldest son, then he would have taken his father’s place in the home. Someone had to be the spiritual leader in the home, and I’m not taking anything away from Mary and her teaching and responsibilities, but Jesus became the teacher in the home, and his brothers and sisters kind of reacted to that. once he was supposed to go to Jerusalem, and he delayed his departure, and they kind of mocked him and said, oh, if you’re such a great person, you better hurry up and go down there to Jerusalem. Which is indicating, once again, that they didn’t fully realize who he was, but he himself knew that he had a responsibility to God, he had a commitment to God, And as the eldest son, he was the teacher in the family, even if the brothers and sisters didn’t particularly like that. He was the eldest. and the teacher.
Well, one other thing, and that is the last moments of his life where he was on the cross, he didn’t forget that godly mother that he had. He said to John, she’s going to be your mother from now on. And he said to her, he’s going to be your son. But it shows the commitment, the home commitment that he had, not even forgetting in this most dire moment that he had a mother that loved the Lord. So I think these things are important. Now, there’s one more thing to cover here.
And that is that the Bible says God hates divorce. I hope you’ve seen so far, this hasn’t been about divorce. This has been about a godly home and godly children. When God says, I hate divorce, again, He’s not saying, I hate certain people. He’s saying the idea, the concept, the working out of a thing called divorce, He says, I hate that. I hate it. Malachi 2, verse 16, if you need a reference. Jesus never has a good word for divorce, but decries its destructiveness and sinful roots.
Nevertheless, even though He never has a good word for divorce, He acquiesced in the laws and regulations that covered Marriage. And as we’ve read, Moses had certain things to say. It was necessary under certain circumstances. But the point is that he said we’re going to go right along with God’s commandments and God’s law here.
Divorce is linked to a lack of compassion and or the abundance of self-entitlement. I don’t care about those kids or I need my place, my time. How many women have said to me, I want to be happy, God wants me to be happy. So I’m divorcing my husband or my wife, whatever. Divorce is linked to lack of compassion and or an abundance of self-entitlement. How do you address this matter? Am I lacking in compassion? Am I being too self-centered?
Divorce is linked to abandonment in the first Corinthians. It talks about the fact that if the unbeliever departs, let them depart, but it’s abandonment as when the promise of one life together is renounced. We’re supposed to have one life together. But I don’t like that, so we’ll break it up. Divorce is linked to adultery, whereby a spouse is ruinously discarded by an unfaithful partner.
The cure of that is to be faithful and not unfaithful. Jesus is always concerned about who’s injured in any circumstance. He was a comforter, a reconciler, a peacemaker, a restorer. And many a divorce might be avoided if people would let the Lord Jesus Christ be the mediator, the healer, the reconciler in the situation. To comfort the injured party as well as to counsel reconciliation.
This is not just a matter of men or women. It’s both men and women sometimes seek divorce. And sometimes, most of the time maybe, both can be at fault. We need to understand that. But the main thing to see is that God wants that pushed out of the picture. You say, you can’t push it out of the picture. It’s so important so much in society. I understand that.
I’m just saying that what the Lord would have is that that never even comes up. That’s never even dealt with. Before we ever even reach that point, you say, Lord, how can we save this situation? How can we reconcile our differences? How can we go ahead and please you and serve you?
And I believe that’s what Jesus is trying to get across here. The Pharisees are the ones that raise the question about divorce. Jesus says, why don’t you concentrate on being a godly husband? And if women were there, a godly wife. Or children there, be godly children. And that will solve the problem. God hates divorce. Because these things are absent. The lack of godly children. The lack of a godly husband. Or wife.
So, even if we ourselves are not in that situation or it’s way in our past, what we can do is pray. Pray, Lord, for my children who are married not to break up. Or if they are broken up, Lord, help them to heal in some way. Help them to see that the right relationship between God and His people is pictured in marriage and one day will be fully consummated when Christ returns again. But until then, we have to live in this world with all its trouble and misfortune and so forth. God help us. Pray for one another. Pray for your children and grandchildren. Pray for marriages to be held together. And the Lord will hear your prayers.
Heavenly Father, bless our day and all that’s connected with it, but bless us, Lord, as those people who want to do right according to you. And even if we’re not married, to be good examples and mentors and those who will help others to stay close and not to harm and to affect one another in a way that will displease you. We ask this in Jesus’ name, amen.